We know what works. You don't.
Why the hell would you be reading this if you knew how to do it? So when you hire us to market your stuff, don't tell us what to do, just look at the results.
We like results, not charts. Try one month of marketing with us and if you don't see an instant return on your investment, we will let you fire someone from our marketing team (fire John please, he's annoying and eats kale) right then and there.